Lossie No Erection Campaign Gets Underway
‘ Lossie No Erection Campaign Gets Underway ‘
After the furore over the unsightly Dandylion in Elgin toon center had died doon and folk got less offended, bored social media moaners turned their attention to another unsightly carbuncle ‘The Lossie Lighthoose’. Lossie campaign group ‘ Destroy Lossie Erection ‘ led by Joe Kerr officially got its protest under way today. They were distributing leaflets at Lossie seafront asking for the ‘Erection’ that is Lossie Lighthouse to be removed.
According to the leaflet the key areas to the campaign are ..
1. Its unsightly architecture makes the natural area look industrial.
2. Every photograph taken in the area has the ‘Erection’ taking all the glory away from beach selfies and bonny clouds.
3. Its phallic shape corrupts teenagers minds with its filthy aura.
4.Its shadow sometimes falls upon picnicking families nearby causing them to move and upsetting the jam sandwiches getting them all sandy. ( Something Campaign leader Joe has personally been affected by)
5. ‘ Lossie Lighthouse Taxis ‘ would have to change their name causing quite an inconvenience. Joe’s own taxi firm ‘ Shipwreck Transfers Services ‘ would not have to change its name.
6.With the lighthouse gone and more sky in photos, sales of blue ink would increase.
7.And more reasons too expensive to print on this leaflet…
A counter campaign group ‘ We love Lossie Erections ‘ quickly sprung up this afternoon on social media claiming to fight to preserve Lossie lighthouse and any other erection in Lossie over 20 feet tall. [We need more erections in Lossie nae less] claimed some posts, and another said [ i moved to Lossie from England just so i could see a Scottish erection everyday, they cant take my one pleasure in life i have left away.]